Category: Personal

27 Life Milestones

Posted on by Ellie Rose McKee

Having just turned twenty-seven a couple of days ago, I thought it might be nice to mark the occasion by listing twenty-seven things I’ve done or achieved, so far. The list is (mostly) in chronological order, starting with the earliest things first. One thing I learnt about myself from compiling this list, is that I tend to do the same things multiple times.

birthday cupcakes

  1. Appeared as a main character in a school play (got an award for it, too)
  2. Moved out of my parent’s house
  3. Went to university (hence the above)
  4. Lived in a different country (again, see above)
  5. Got a pet (okay, several pets)
  6. Gave blood
  7. Got a tattoo (I have three, so far)
  8. Became a Sunday School teacher (briefly)
  9. Travelled outside the UK
  10. Volunteered for charity (1000 voluntary hours and counting)
  11. Went on holiday on my own (countless times)
  12. Moved out of my parent’s house and lived in a different country (a second time)
  13. Published a book
  14. Published a second book
  15. Completed a ‘Photo-A-Day’ project
  16. Had a normal job
  17. Had a breakdown
  18. Jacked in the normal job and started my own business
  19. Published a third book
  20. Went to a music festival (one of those holidays I had on my own)
  21. Saw my favorite band live (at said music festival)
  22. Became an aunty
  23. Fell in love
  24. Got engaged
  25. Published a fourth bo- you get the idea. It’s a lot of books.
  26. Moved out of my parent’s house (again!)
  27. Became a god-mother 🙂

The Run-Up to Reading

Posted on by Ellie Rose McKee

Before I take part in an event – big or small – my nerves are on edge. I feel sick, and flighty, and weepy.

…so, that’s me, pretty much now-ish. My reading at Women Aloud NI is happening TOMORROW!

Situation clearly dire, I just had to run out for a stack of emergency chocolate (don’t eat your feelings, kids!). And I made myself so flustered that I almost said thank you to the cashier, completely forgetting that I’d just used a self-serve till :-/

Now, seeing as it took me six attempts and three Google searches to spell the word dire correctly, I’m gonna go eat said chocolate and have a little cry to myself.

How are you this evening?

10 Ways to Deal with Being Doxed!

Posted on by Ellie Rose McKee

Dealing with DoxingIf you find out you’ve been doxed (had your private information acquired and shared online), you have my genuine sympathies. I’m not suggesting you follow all of the steps below (beyond numbers six, seven, and nine), this is just how I reacted…

  1. Be Shocked
  2. Be Scared
  3. Panic a Bit
  4. Wonder if You’re Over-Reacting
  5. Go Through a Few More Cycles of Shock and Fear
  6. Take Screenshots of the Harassment (as evidence, in case the person deletes and denies it)
  7. Find out How People Got Your Details, and Just What Information is Actually Online About You (HINT: It’s probably a lot)
  8. Despair at Humanity
  9. Block and Report the Trolls
  10. Write an Angry Blog Post

There are a few ways I could start this blog post – this is not the blog post I had planned to be writing; I was actually feeling really productive and had planned to get shit done when someone ruined my night; I’ve recently been diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder, and I don’t need any of this stress right now – but all of that boils down to this: last night, some guy I have never met, decided it was appropriate to share part of my address on Twitter because I’m taking part in an event and his partner isn’t.

Yup. For real.

I’ve considered naming and shaming, but have ultimately decided not to give any more details about the situation – at least not right now – beyond saying the person did it to more than just myself, and that he’s been reported to Twitter for it.

Tomorrow, I will be promoting the event as I had originally planned, in a separate post not connected to this negative crap. I don’t want to risk bringing a really positive movement down any further. I just really needed to vent.

This is so far from okay, but I will not be scared into silence. Not over something so stupid.

Having that anxiety disorder I mentioned, and after watching my friend go through a much worse case of doxing just before Christmas, I’d been worried something like this might happen to me, and I recently bought extra security for this site – insuring that my personal details aren’t on who.is, as a result.

The take-away message is that people can still get your details easily enough. I recommend doing some searches to see what’s floating around online about you (start with Google, but also look at pipl.com), and adjusting your privacy settings accordingly.

The Last Night Alone (What’s Going On 2k16)

Posted on by Ellie Rose McKee

This is a bit of a life update, because a lot seems to be going on in my life right now.

As I mentioned in my end of year post for 2015, I got engaged. And now, on the one-year anniversary of when we first spoke/instant messaged – TOMORROW – my partner and I are moving in together! Add to that the recent launch of the new wing to my business, and the book launch I’m having in two-days time, things. are. hectic!

Having just returned from the shop with a small easter egg for myself, I was about to tweet “Having a small party for myself, on my last night alone.” Yes, eating chocolate may not exactly equate to a party, but think about what I just said, for a second. My last night alone. Forever.

That’s kinda only just sank in.

I don’t know if you’ve noticed, dear reader, but we’re now living in a modern world. Having hailed from a strict Christian upbringing, certain things from “normal life” (that is, things from outside the influence of the church) still feel a bit alien to me.

From my parent’s point of view, there is a certain sequence in which things are done: you meet someone, you get engaged, you get married, *then* you move in. Whereas, for most other people, you meet someone, fall in love, move in, and then comes the engagement and marriage bit, but it’s entirely optional.

It was as a kind of compromise between these two ways of going at it that my partner and I got engaged before we started house hunting, yet are moving in before we actually take vows. (Always a fan of the untravelled road that is the third option.)

For many people, moving in with someone is not a binding promise to be with them the rest of your lives, the way marriage is, but seeing as we’ve already resolved to do that, albeit at a later time; this, for us, will indeed be our last night alone.

It’s just occurred to me that perhaps now is when the bachelorette party should take place. Tradition needs to grow and change with society. (Which ultimately makes me think of whole same-sex marriage issue, but that’s a whole other blog post.)

Tonight, I’m celebrating love (by means of eating chocolate), and tomorrow I start a new adventure. Who’s with me?

2015: A Year in Review

Posted on by Ellie Rose McKee

Engagement RingSince re-launching this website way back in January, I have written forty-seven blog posts (including this one). That’s way more than I’ve written, across the three separate blogs I used to run, in the last few years combined.

Also this year, I’ve written just over ninety thousand words of fan fiction, and a totally unknown amount of other words in poetry, and novels, short stories etc (the fanfic word count is a lot easier to keep track of).

With regards reading, my final stats for the year sit at a total of forty-six books read off a forty-book target.

In the month of December, I listened to one audiobook (You’re Never Weird on the Internet… Almost, by Felicia Day), read two novel-length fanfics, finished a third, finished The Horologicon, and read Where She Went cover to cover.

In 2015, I re-released Wake as a second edition, released Four Season Summer and Season’s End in a combined paperback edition, had a book launch for that paperback, received awards for my fan fiction, entered writing competitions, re-launched my YouTube channel, took part in April’s CampNaNoWriMo, July’s Camp NaNo, and the official National Novel Writing month in November.

Meanwhile, in my personal life, I took a few more trips to England, met the love of my life, and got engaged. All that considered, I think it’s been a pretty great year. Roll on 2016!

Writing is a Real Job!

Posted on by Ellie Rose McKee

Writing is a real job and, more specifically, it’s my full time job. Yes, full time! I may well be preaching (/ranting) to the converted here, but I need to get this off my chest.

For some, writing is a hobby. They don’t put all their time into it, and they don’t get money back out of it. But, for others, it can be and often is a legitimate job.

I am sick of people talking about my career in terms of ‘that thing you do until you grow up and choose a proper profession.’ These comments are often meant well, but that only makes them more infuriating. People are worried that I’m wasting my time, or fearful about my financial stability. Which is nice, in a way, but also rather patronizing.

I am an adult, and whether I have money to pay my bills is – shockingly – none of my friend or family’s business. The older I get, the more I realize that there is no such thing as a “safe” career path. No job is completely secure.

Sure, some are more secure than others, but if there’s going to be risk no matter what, why not aim for what you really want?

This may come across as bitter, but that’s not how I mean it. I’m simply frustrated by the attitude that my life has to fit a very narrow specification in order to constitute being acceptable.

No, I don’t work nine-to-five, Monday to Friday; and yes, I do mostly work from my bedroom, but I put in a hell of a lot of effort, and I’m not being particularly risky or ridiculous in doing so, I’m bravely living the dream.

This has been a public service announcement. Thank you and goodnight.

Positivity, Possibilities, and Pushing Myself

Posted on by Ellie Rose McKee

Following up on my last blog post, I can now tell you that not only will my work be in the exhibition, starting Thursday, but I’ve been asked to read at the event, too. And, if that’s not enough, I’ve also been told there’ll be a photo-op with the Mayor. Exciting times!

This has really come out of knowing the organizers. In previous years I considered entering a poem but, in the end, I shied away. This year, however, I was greatly encouraged, and it’s made all the difference.

On that note: I went to the local poetry recital I blogged about, as planned, and I’ve decided to enter the FSNI competition after all.

My partner has been telling me I need to push myself/self promote more, and I have to admit that I think he’s right. Even if I don’t come anywhere near winning either of the competitions, I’m already glad I entered. Even if my artwork doesn’t sell, I’ll have still made it, and I’ll be able to keep it and show people.

This week, and going forward, I’m feeling positive. If there’s something I want to do, I’m going to go for it. Who knows where it will lead me?

Fan Fiction Milestones

Posted on by Ellie Rose McKee

On this day two years ago – July 28th, 2013 – I wrote and posted my first ever piece of fan fiction. Since then, fanfic has become a big part of my life, both as a writer and as a reader. It’s my release for when my novel isn’t going the way I want, or when life isn’t going the way I want, and I find it generally good writing practice as well. So, I thought I’d share some statistics in celebration of the anniversary. Fanfic Award Plaque

Basic Stats:

  • Over 5,000 Profile Views | Fanfiction.net
  • Received over 1,300 Reviews
  • 77 Followers | Fanfiction.net
  • On the Favorite Author List of 60 Members | Fanfiction.net
  • On the Favorite Author List of 43 Members | Elysian Fields
  • My Most Popular Story – ‘After the End’ – has over 80,000 Views

I have written:

  • Over 200,000 words of Fanfiction for Buffy the Vampire Slayer/Angel the Series.
  • Over 3,000 words of Fanfic for other fandoms (Harry Potter, Crow, Serenity, Ten Things I Hate About You, and Once Upon a Time).
  • Over 500 Reviews, Totaling over 21,000 words | Elysian Fields
  • Over 100 Reviews | Fanfiction.net
  • 6 Challenges | Elysian Fields

Continue reading →

Life as a Full-Time Writer

Posted on by Ellie Rose McKee

I thought some people might be interested to hear about what a full-time writer/author does all day, so I thought I’d share a little insight into my work.

It must be pointed out, however, that the following just applies to me, and that other writers can and will have different schedules. What I love about writing is the flexibility it has, and I’m really interested to find out about what other authors get up to (if you are an author and you’re reading this, please leave a comment to compare and contrast your experience).

But enough pre-amble, here are the basics: I work full time (which is to say, a minimum of thirty hours a week), I work from home (translation: my bed), and I write in a number of areas (fiction, non-fiction, fan fiction, poetry, etc.) and my daily tasks often don’t involve writing at all.

That last point might surprise you the most but, you see, I am currently my own agent, editor, publisher, and social media manager and this leads me to doing a range of tasks that a lot of other writers will never think about let alone encounter.

In this past month I have… Continue reading →

Depression and Writing and Me

Posted on by Ellie Rose McKee

It’s been quite a while since I burst into tears for no apparent reason, but tonight I did. Sometimes that’s what depression is like – it hits you out of nowhere. And sometimes it’s just this thing in the background that is on your radar, but no one else has any awareness of it in your life.

Depending on how it affects you (and it does affect people differently) it can really get in the way of ‘normal life’. It can be hard to hold down a job, for example, when things are really bad.

I’m lucky that I work for myself and can arrange my own schedule, to compensate for and work around those days where I’m just not up to it.

Writing in itself usually helps me feel better, but some days it doesn’t work and I can’t compose a coherent tweet let alone work on anything more substantial.

I wanted to write a post for mental health week, but this isn’t the one I imagined. I guess I wanted to be more factual. To come across more professional. But that’s just the thing, isn’t it? My writing is an extension of who I am. And today who I am is a little bit of a mess. Not everything has to be perfect, I remind myself. In fact, some things are probably better being raw. So this is it: my personal experience of being a full time writer with mental health issues. It’s not profound, or polished, but it’s here. I encourage you to tell your story, also. No matter what it looks like.